Not Me Monday

Join me and MckMama and her many followers as we proudly deny doing anything that would embarrass us or our families.

This week, I did not stand on a playground in the rain when it was 50 degrees outside so Quinn could play for 20 minutes. I know better than to think that 20 minutes on a playground is ever enough for him, and I would rather head straight home than fight him to get him back in the car when I had had enough of cold and rain.

I did not have to give in to my husband and wear his fleece sweatshirt when it got cold. I am totally prepared to be pregnant in the fall (WINTER!) after literally planning it this way to avoid another pregnant August. I did not then complain about the mall being insufferably hot and not being able to take off the sweatshirt because my tank underneath came nowhere CLOSE to covering the belly band of my jeans.

I did not skip church on the day I was supposed to work the nursery because I had a terrible sore throat. I take care of myself and was in no way concerned about symptoms that were starting to point to swine flu, because I AM NOT PARANOID!

I did not almost support my husband in his desire to buy a baby onesie as a gift for a coworker that said "I love my Daddy [in small letters] even if he is an @$$hole" from Spencer's. I have more class than that!!

I did not have to expose most of Greenville to a screeching, red-faced, grunting child shrieking "BOBBY DIAPER MICKEY MOUSE" (translation: I'm trying to poop in my Mickey Mouse diaper") for about three days in a row this weekend. This did not include Kmart (because I don't shop at Kmart), two restaurants, the mall, Costco, and anywhere else you could imagine. My kid has NO trouble going to the bathroom.

I did not tell my 2-year-old "Fine, whatever" at least 6 times in the past week. I'm a responsible parent who doesn't talk to her child like that.

I did not encourage my sister and brother-in-law to have "good sex" on their 1st anniversary cruise in front of the child who had just finished repeating every other word I said.

There you go. As you can tell, I had a GREAT week being a responsible, classy parent and wife. Love, Us.